26/09/05 Monday

6.34pm HE miss called… I called back… 1^st thing HE asked …. Still whether I m pak tor or not? …. Sigh… I make clear tat…. I m not pak tor’ing…. Then HE asked to have lunch on coming Friday…. I say shud be ok…..

then listening to HIS dilemma with boiboi……. HE says HE & boiboi got discussed b4 can hang out with own frens… no need everyday be 2gether…. HE says HIS boiboi mostly hang out with gals… so can fong sam …… HE HIMSELF …. Always go home alone in house…. Dunno find who hang out…. HE says got a customer got intention wanna kao HIM … asked HIM yam cha… I say HE can hang out with HIS own frens … but shud not hang out with those just know de fren which got intention on HIM…. Coz not fair to HIS boiboi lor… erm…. Then HE asked I seldom call HIM jor… so quiet … izzit bcoz tat I dun call HIM jor…. I say ya lu…with joking tone…. :x then HE says dun like tat lar… I can call HIM de mar… I say dun wan lu… coz sked disturb HE pak tor’ing …. HE says wont lar… I just bitter laugh …..

HE say HE always think a lot when HE alone at home….. & HE veli sked to be alone at home … that day went back hometown…. HE so relax at home…. But once touch down kl from bus… HE felt so pressure jor …. After few days oni felt better …. I feel like wanna say…. Why din YOU tell me tat time…. ? Why din YOU call me tat time… but I din….. coz tat is not my job any more…. >.< … tat’s some one else jobs….

Then HE got says about HIS boiboi got nagged by parent going out often …. HE says just like me last time de situation…. :X …..

25/09/05 Sunday

33^rd Movie: Flightplan * * * ½

Great movie… Jodie Foster is so great… her acting, he tears rolling on the eyes without dropping down… Geng! Storyline is something special… finding her daughter inside the plane …. All the other passengers & aircrew tot she is crazy & dun believe her…. But at the end all the passengers & aircrew were touched by her &amp; felt guilty for not believing her… at the end the interaction between Jodie & the passengers touched me….. sob sob sob …..

23/09/05 Friday

Early morning reached hotel ... then coz the floor slippery .... nearly slip... =.-" .... got 1 ppl ter'see me ..... pai seh die me.... *-.-* .... then.... so sui ....... the left shoe ...... ter'open mouth in front.... >.<"" cham...... lucky still not that obvius lu..... need to go repair later when back to office ... aiks.... so 'black" this morning.....

Pretend

7.08pm HE miss called while I was driving to Pyramid so din return call yet
7.38pm HE miss called again.... jam at Sunway tol.... din return call yet oso
7.46pm called HIM back..... HE says "wah... so bz pak tor izzit?" ...... >.<>.<>
Actually Morning I will be in hotel then after everything settle I will go back office and then around 3pm will go back hotel again de.... so if i wanna spend some time with HIM for lunch oso can de... but .... I dun think I wan lu~ ... coz a bit rush for me... still got things to rush in office.... so once again .... I say cannot make it... after last week... then HE with the pak tor'ing issue.... >.< .... I m speechless..... saw Yuanfen liao .... I say told HIM dun wan chat lu... hanged up.



32nd Movie : Cinderella Man * * * *

For me the movie was quite touching lu~ especially the love part between a husband & wife.. both Russell Crowe & Renée Zellweger is great in the movie..... cry a bit ... coz thinking how real is the PLU love... will it be as real as the str8 couple in the movie? ..........


On the way back home ..... thinking wanna chnange mind .... spend time go lunch with HIM tomolo? ........ conclusion.... No lu~..... I dun wan pretend happy in front of HIM .... coz after seeing HIM will think too much ..... pretend happy on the phone enough jor..... :x

Reached home .... on9 a while ... listen to the voice clips from the fren.... wakakaka.... funny... hehe... then ooi ooi lu~..... (Fansu kena voted as Malaysian LaLa Club Idol 2005 ..... wakakaka!!) :x

21/09/05 Wednesday

A fren upgraded the MSN to 7.5 version... hehe... can send voice clip.... this fren so funny .... like to sing & tell jokes ..... enjoy listening to his singing ..... especially when he sing wrong .... he pai seh.... wakakaka... so cute... then he tell jokes ... some more tell in wrong way de joke..... pai seh again..... wahahaha..... laugh die me.... saved liao almost all the voice clips .... can listen again & again ..... ngek ngek ...... Because of him, I started to like Nan Quan Ma Ma de song lu~ ..... hehe.... nice nice.... Listen to him till almost 1am .... aiks... cham .... panda eyes more serious liao lu~ >.<

A fren says he suddenly felt lonely.... asked me do I feel the same? ..... I answered lonely die me lu~ ... :x He asked how lonely?..... everyday... work, eat, home, ... watch korean drama... on9 but most of the time no chat.... sit blur in front the pc screen.... U say like this lonely mar? Last month de phone bill oni RM55.79 ... not even up to RM75 for the maxis plan.... rugi jor..... :x U say like this lonely mar? ....... like this is sick jor... i think...... I think this is depressed jor ... need to see doctor jor lu~.. :z must find a leng zai doctor to consult sin.... wakakaka :p

20/09/05 Tuesday

2.01pm received a phone call….. asked me remember who is he or not? =.-“ I tot got bin tai lou call me….. :x hehe….. It’s Ooby… haha….using office phone to call …… erm…. Dun really remember his voice lu~ coz only chat one time on phone de ….. He sound a bit tired oh ….. just changed department at work.. sure needs time to adjust lu~ ….. hope he will be doing great de~ …. Now Ooby needs to wear office attire liao …. Must be looking veli smart lu~ …. :D …. Ooby! Jia you~ !

That day read some articles informed by a net fren…. Some articles on Newspaper Guang Ming ….. there are 7 articles all reporting about PLU in Malaysia…. I think now many ppl knew .. Gay in Malaysia called themselves PLU jor …. & they oso got mentioned 3 most popular gay pub in kl …. Of coz doesn’t mention the names ….. but for PLU veli obvious that is LQ, BlueBoy & Zouk….. they oso mention the Lost World in KL … Bandar Tun Razak de & Kelana Jaya de ….. & plus oso some restaurants & shops & karaoke tat managed by PLU ….. how to see whether it’s a PLU shop or not …. By reconised the colourful paint, PLU often hanged colourful cloth, the toilet often got handsome man poster … or shirtless man poster ….. they oso report how PLU recognized each other…. How they “scan” ppl …. By looking their eyes …. See got any feedback from them …. By looking at the style of dressing …… =.-“” I think now shud hv a lot of ppl know wat is PLU stand for …. ……. Thanks for the reporter from newspaper Guang Ming …. :)

Loneliness

There are 3 things you cannot hide from others….. Cough, ……… Poverty, ……… & Love ……... however …. There is one more thing cannot be hide…. which is …. Loneliness…..

19/09/05 Monday

7.33pm … HE on9 IRC … I was taking bath

7.37pm… HE pm me … says … Hi Hi, I m homesick ar……. U r veli bz recently ar?

8.05pm… finish my dinner … HE still on IRC & join lalaclub …… I saw HIS pm msg …… I wanted to answer HIS pm msg… I m not bz… but I m veli lonely ar….

But I din reply … just sitting there looking at the monitor screen ….

HE miss home …. I miss HIM ….

Got a lot of things I wanna know from HIM ….

I wanna ask HIM, HE din go back hometown last Tuesday?

I wanna ask HIM, how is family?

I wanna ask HIM, hv HE paid HIS exam fees?

I wanna ask HIM, did HIS boiboi follow HIM back hometown?

But I m speechless …. The more I know the more I will be sick ………

8.29pm… HE say bye bye in channel & off9

HE homesick…. I lovesick….

How to find a boyfren?

How to find a boyfren that doesn’t on9 flirt?

How to find a boyfren that doesn’t clubbing?

How to find a boyfren that doesn’t judge looks?

How to find a boyfren that love me?

Moon Cake

9.46am… HE miss called…. HE say later afternoon wan lunch mar? wan pass me 1 moon cake…. I say I not in office …. Ask HIM to keep the moon cake for HIMSELF…

I m not sure whether I will be in office or not…. Coz today got some errands need to run… but if I wan I still can spend some time with HIM …..

I avoid to meet HIM today…. Coz I know… after I meet HIM I will be getting emotional ….

These few days …. A bit down … really down …. Thinking too much …. if got a pill tat eat liao will never wake up again …. I guess I wont think twice to eat it…. :x

But in reality … I dun hv this kind of pill …. So dun worry…. :p

No one care liao lu~

All busy pak tor … no one free to care about me jor lu~… so ke lian… sob sob sob …

On Leave Again

09/09/05 Friday

Today a busy day …….

12.30pm…. go for a hair cut….

1.45pm…. go fetch mom back home …..

2.00pm…. rushed down to low yat meet Vans for facial…

reached low yat at 2.30pm….. saw yuanfen with vans … hehe….. surprise….

We go eat lunch 1^st…. eat duck rice…. Nice J

3.00pm….. yuanfen go for his dating….. me & vans go ban leng leng do facial…..

when go skin check….. so many problems…. Oily lar, big pores lar, congested pores lar, pimples marks lar….. >.<””

3.40pm oni start do facial….

Soooooo~ pain ….. L

Like ppl say… pay money for pain oni….. hahaha…..

Around 5.45 …. Finally finished liao… wah… shinning de face…. Hehe…. J

Then around 6.05pm….. HE miss called….. I din called back …. Coz talking to the facial therapist …… 2 mins later….. HE miss called again ….. I called back …. HE say wanna come find me now…. Coz wanna go Carrefour buy things ….. I say I not at home ar…. At KL Low Yat …… HE says … oh…. With frens ar? I say yes……. Then HE say never mind lar….. hanged up…..

Around 6.45pm….. rushed to MV…. Meet fansu, orange zai & nottie tom there….

Fansu still so cute…. Orange zai still so …. Fit….. hahaha…. :p

Nottie tom…. 1^st time meet him…. He so pai seh …….

Let orange zai decide eat wat………….. finally …. KFC =.-“” hahaha…..

After eat KFC…. I wan go buy Ice Cream for Nottie Tom…. Coz promise jor him mar…. he so pai seh ….. keep say dunwan….. :s

Around 10pm…. Go back home lu…..

So tired de…. So oni fetch fansu till LRT….. next time oni fetch him back home …. :p

10/09/05 Saturday

oni go out dinner with lala members ….. everyone oso late….. =.-“

say 8.30pm goto BD ……

8.30pm I at the roundabout ….. called Sebs….. that sui zai … ask him where is he….

He say coming ….. nia sing…. I heard got ppl talking lor…. I ask him … still at home izzit?…. He laughed….. ma de…. =.-“” then oni say wanna come out liao ……..

Chubby vans .. no need say lar.. always late geh …. :x

10.53pm…. HE miss called…. I called back….. HE say need me to topup hp credit… I topup for HIM ……

11.30pm…. go home ….. with empty heart …. Feeling…. Moodless…..

11/09/05 Sunday

11am oni woke up … rotting at home whole day…

08/09/05 Thursday

Last nite when goto Time Square watch movie…. Oso went to Low Yat bought CDs…. Finally can burns all the drama & movies & anime in to CDs liao …. & download new Korean drama….. hehe…

Today morning … woke up …. Still a bit headache… >.<” cham liao … seems like whole week oso headache…. L

Tomolo on leave …. Yay~!…

Tml need goto MV belanja the nottie tom eat ice cream…. He so nottie … tricks me 1…. Say exam cannot get As lar… this lar tat lar…. So I mar encourage him lor…. Say if got As I buy him ice cream lor….. aiks…. Who knows so easy gets As…. >.< " Need to buy him 3 scoops ice cream…. Hahaha… ;p no lar … actually happy to buy him 1…. Can get 2 As J

See can go with fansu & orange mou….. :x

Noon … plan goto do facial with vans … J goto ban leng leng …

07/09/05 Wednesday

HE miss called at 9.25am…. I called back… HE says find HIM lunch & HE wanna pay back money to me…. I say ok….

I brought a bag to HIM … which I got it from a conference at hotel yesterday…. Inside got a 5 colour highlighter, 2 sample of facial cleanser, 2 boxes of multi vitamins, 1 bottle of vitamin C, 2 pens & some lyrics I printed for HIM….

1.06pm…. HE came out from college… HE says the beg… erm… if HE take to work… sure HIS colleagues will laugh HIM …. I say inside go a lot of things ar…. Then HE just took the lyrics & says HE collect the beg next time when HE finish class & no need go to work…

HE says HE got think of go pierce a earring … a veli nice de earring…. HE says HIS colleagues laugh HIM …. HE will looks so sissy :x …… I speechless …. HE is so into KL life liao…. & become a typical kl plu … tat’s wat I dun wanna see… but tat’s seem the way he heading to…..

31^st Movie : Dark Water * * *

Jennifer so beautiful…. & if she is a male….. sure will be veli handsome …. Wahahaha :X the movie a bit different from the Japanese version … this version more to describe the love of a mother in details …… not so scary compare with Japanese version….. but I was scared by the gal sit next to me…. coz she scream twice…. >.<” at the end of the movie …. Yuanfen cry… coz touched by the part … the mother come back sayang the gal…. I felt touch too …. But din cry… maybe … I was tired & still headache…. L

B4 the movie …. I saw seamus …. Then I told yuanfen … yuanfen sms seamus …. & confirm it’s seamus …. He & his kor, sean cool, watch “she’s on duty” at 9.30pm…. & yuanfen saw a few PLUs tat he saw during clubbing in LQ…. :x

Back home ….. saw my blog … got a person use my nick write stupid things in the chatter box …… dun 9 lan …. Deleted the chatter box ….. I got his ip address …. :x

Need lang jing & san sum

05/09/05 Monday

From last nite I can feel that HE got something wanna tell me …. But HE dun dare to tell me ….

My hp today sot sot jor….. auto off few times… sigh…. Must be the battery de problem.

I got six sense that HE might wanna find me hv lunch today…

Around 8.40pm….. I saw HE pm me at IRC…. after chat rubbish a while ….. He says he called me few times at noon, but my hp not on..... HE says got something to tell me…. HE says HE pak tor with a boy ….. HE says 3 weeks jor…. HE says got problems with the boy ….. HE asked me does HE suitable to be a person that to protect ppl? HE says HE need to off line liao ….

9.15pm…. HE went back home …… HE miss called me…. I called back …. HE told me the problems with the boiboi …. I asked HIM give more time to the boiboi … coz the boiboi oso need time to adjust his feelings… HE cry…. I pain….. HE says HE really really likes the boiboi…. The boiboi is really really cute…. The boiboi oso really really like HIM …. But din say love HIM ..

9.40pm…. vans called … he reached my place jor … I wan go out lang jing & san sum… so nice vans can pui me … J I pui him eat dinner…. I told HIM I need to go out for a break…. HE asked me… m I sad coz HE told me HE pak tor? Or m I sad becoz HE is not happy in HIS relationship….. I answered both oso got….

I help HIM to top up hp credit…. Coz HE say wanna call another fren to chat….

11.42pm … called HIM again after reached home…… HE say feeling better…. Chat with another fren… a gal …. HE says HE decided to stay as fren with the boiboi …. But when HE called the boiboi & wanna tell the boiboi…. The boiboi sound sad… so HE dun dare to tell… & decided to stay attached …. & see how later…. Once again … I asked HIM to give more time….. HE says maybe next time HE need to find a person tat can protect HIM …… I was speechless ….. my heart say…. Cant I protect u?

after hang up ….. I realized I hv totally defeated by youth & cute….

06/09/05 Tuesday

Headache …. 2 days din sleep well …..

Summary again….

02/09/05 Friday

1^st day chubby Vans come back kl …. Must hv lala gathering!

We decided 11pm… go near leisure mall yam cha….

10.30pm…. Vans called…. Now oni wan go bath & prepare go out…. >.<

11.00pm…. called Vans …. He now go fetch Haruko…

11.25pm…. me & Sebastian reached 1^st…..

11.50pm…. Vans & Haruko reached …..

till 1.20am …. Lala yam cha successful.

03/09/05 Saturday

Meeting Joaquin for a movie ….

10am… reached MV…. I go buy tickets 1^st….

10.05am …. Standing near the “roundabout” waits for Joaquin….

I din take his hp number…. Coz he say he can recognized me …..

Actually I saw him there oredi…. But din go say Hi 1^st….

Wait him come to me…. pretend dun recognized him…. Ngek ngek….

10.10am…. he walked away jor…. Dunno where he gone…. :x

10.15am…. suddenly come beside me….. asked m I Mike J

10.20am …. We go walk around …. Seldom talk…. Erm… not because I dun hv thinks to talk …. It’s becoz he wearing sunglass …. I cant see his eyes ….. :x

10.50am…. go in the cinema ….

30^th Movie : Red Eye * * * ½

Not bad … the movie quite excited…. But 1 thing …. No leng zai L

Wakakaka…..

After the movie…. Quite oso …. Go hv lunch …..

Finally he take off his sunglass….. can see his eyes jor :p

Chat chat on & off ….. chat about the movie….. chat about other movies …

Chat about songs ….

We walked around after tat…. Keep walking & walking ….

So tired…. He not veli familiar with MV….

I say his hair so long~….. go cut…. He says I wanna be his mum izzit? >.<

he says I m childish…. I say old ppl try act childish …. He says I m not acting…. >.<

3.15pm…. Vans sms … ask wanna meet up later?

Then we decided meet in MV 1^st….. He asked me dun tell Joaquin…. He come spy Joaquin …. :x 3.25pm he say he otw to MV jor….

Me & Joaquin … still walk around MV….. really tired….

I told him got ppl coming later … asked him wanna meet then….

He asked who…. I told him Vans & kenken…

He says … erm…. Dun wan…. He will pui me until they reached MV… so good boi J

3.55pm … vans & kenken reached liao … Joaquin go liao ….

Then the sui vans wan go pak tor 1^st …. Dun wan meet me 1^st…. sei yeh!….

I hv to walk alone until 4.30pm…. so I go dermalogica did a skin analysis… then purchased a trial pack facial product.

B4 5pm ….. vans, kenken, haruko & I goto burger king yam cha ….

Then we decided go to Petaling Street hv dinner …. So called Sebastian go there meet us.

7.35pm…. at Petaling Street …. Order food….. chubby vans so lek…. Order till so much… :x but still ok lar… but the fish failed! Coz the fish is still raw de….. :

8.15pm …. Sebastian reached

9.20pm…. I fetched haruko go home 1^st …. Then I go home

Lala dinner successful~!

04/09/05 Sunday

HE din called last nite…. Friday HE say maybe will come find me today after HE fong gong coz HE wanna go see doctor…. …. But will confirm later …..

5.25pm HE miss called … I called back ….. HE says will come after fong gong…. Around 6.30pm will reach LRT station.

6.15pm…. goto Bukit Jalil LRT station…. The road blocked jor… coz got function there… so hv to goto Sri Petaling station…

6.30pm…. HE reached …. Din chat much ….. HE say later no need fetch HIM back home coz HE need goto work place take something from fren …. then HE fall into sleep …. Until reached the clinic …… I guessed tat…. HE is not going back work place take things ….. but go there wait a “fren” go home 2gether….. why wanna wait tat fren? …… must hv something between them lor ….

After see doctor…. I help HIM pay medical fees 1^st… coz HE not yet get salary… then we go dinner… my heart…. Was pain …. During dinner… but I still joke with HIM … coz dun wan HIM feel I m sad …

After dinner …. 9.05pm…. sent HIM to lrt station …. Looking at HIS back while he walking towards the lrt station… I can see that something is bordering HIM … makes HIM not cheerful …. HE says after HE reach home…. HE will sms me.

11.40pm…. still dun hv sms from HIM ….. I wanna goto bed liao ….. called HIM….HE says HE forgot ….. & HE says HE din goto HIS work place take things from fren…. Asked me … m I angry? I wanna say …. I m sad more than angry…. But I say nothing…. & need to pretend I felt nothing at all ….

after hang up ... sad .... coz can sense HE oredi having a relationship jor ..... tears drop.....
12.20am slept till 2.30am ...... then woke up ... roll & roll on bed ..... roll till tears drop again .....
3.40am.... sit up ..... go on9...
Ah prince & Joaquin still there..... joke with them ..... until 5.05am....
go back to bed .... slept till 7.45am .... so tired ..... prepare to work ....

Countdown Nite

Dun plan to go out for countdown…. Dun wan goto crowded places…. Sked hot & sweat… :p

6.08pm Fansu called… asked wanna go out mar? We decided goto MV around 9.30pm… see got wat show to watch …. After that we goto Bukit Jalil… see got fireworks to see mar…

8.45pm … saw Fansu rolled out the LRT station … then dunno rolled to where jor… >.<” called fansu but maxis suddenly no coverage …. Aiks…. Finally … fansu managed found my car and rolled into my kancil :x

9.10pm… found parking in MV…. Yay…. Queue up to buy tickets …. We decided if before 9.35pm we watch All about my dog ….. after 9.35pm then we watch Drink Drank Drunk …. Luckily 9.30pm is our turn jor…. So we watch All about my dog… J Fansu rolled away to buy water.

29^th Movie: All about my dog * * * ½

Simple but meaningful movie …. Main story is Yomada & his dog, Pochi. In between got 2 other side stories… the side stories is funny…. J after tat…. Got a simple & touching story about Mika & her dog, Marimo. At 1^st is wat Mika view about her dog, Marimo …. Tat part oredi touching…. Can see Fansu curi curi wipe off tears…. :x the 2^nd part is Marimo view about Mika …. More touching…. Fansu wipe off tears again … :x …. Me oso got cry but din so obvious wipe tears … :x just let it drop down …. :p hehe …

After the movie … 11.05pm … goto Bukit Jalil de taman ….

Reached the taman around 11.35pm…. so many cars….

11.45pm …. Goto the spot tat can see KLCC …. A memorable spot to me…. this is where I confessed to HIM. :x

listening to the radio … starts countdown…… 12.00am! merdeka…. But cant see sg. Wang de fireworks L kl area is too low…. Got apartment block the view…. then suddenly … another place pop fireworks…. We think is Ikano…. Then nearby MV got fireworks oso …. Yay!…. after tat nearby KLCC got fireworks… haha…. So nice can see most of the fireworks… happy ~ …. J

Thx to fansu oso … J coz temam Mike